Category Archives: Leadership

Christ-filled Relationships require being Emotionally Intelligent in Christ

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Edge God In Podcast 147:  Christ-filled Relationships require being Emotionally Intelligent in Christ

EdgeGodIn.com | Host: Dr. Estella Chavous

Championing Human Potential in Christ

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Learning Objective:  Increase your Christ-filled Relationships with Emotional Intelligence in Christ

Proverbs 3: 5 | John 14:26 | Matthew 7:1–2 | Galatians 1:10 7 | James 1:19–20 | Exodus 4:12Luke 5:17-26

Edge God In Podcast 26: 3 Excuses that Edge God Out

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Edge God In Podcast 26: 3 Excuses That Edge God Out

Dear Lord, I give you permission to slow me down. Too often I am unwilling to edge you into my busy life, as if being busy makes me more important or purposeful. Teach me how to hear your invitation to draw near to you today. Override my agenda, to-do lists and pursuit to be enough and fill them with your presence Lord. Forgive me for every declined invitation I have sent back to you. Forgive me for putting things above my relationship with you and the people I love. I know your word does not return to you void but accomplishes the purpose for which it’s sent. If I am too busy you will use someone else to accomplish your will on earth. Wake me up to remember what I have learned during the storms in my life. Lord, where else do I need to go, for in you and with you I lack nothing. No more excuses, I choose you. Move me to draw closer to you today than yesterday.

Click Here to Download the PDF Edge God In Bible Study for this Podcast: EdgeGodIn Week 25-3 Excuses that Edge God Out

Edge God In Podcast 16: Relationship Management EQ

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My ability to respond in a conscious Godly manner in the face of negative emotions is in direct proportion to my awareness around the truth that I am not another person’s emotional expressions. As I anchor my identity and beliefs in God, I am able to offer responses that validate, empathize and encourage the sender of the emotions. When I forget that I am safe and connected the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords I am vulnerable to defensive behavior which pushes people away and blocks healthy solutions. “1-Uping”, “You Should” and “At least” language will prevent a healthy flow of meaning between me and the sender of the emotions. Dear God, who will save me from my insecurities and self-doubt and fear? Thanks, be to God through Jesus Christ my Lord, I can give space for the Holy Spirit to anchor me in Christ’s confident, consistent loving kindness which will overflow into my emotional intelligence within relationships I encounter on my earth school journey.

Edge God In Podcast 17: Relationship Management EQ

Self-Awareness => Self-Management

Social Awareness => Relationship Management

Click Here to Download the PDF Edge God In Bible Study for this Podcast: EdgeGodIn Week 16- 4th Step in Emotional Intelligence

Episode 15: Step 3 Emotional Intelligence: Social Awareness

What? It’s not all about me? Grant me the grace of Philippians 2:3 so that I have the patience and depth of surrender of my identity into you needed to truly consider the needs of others better than my own. Jesus, you said that if I desire to find my life I must lose it, perhaps the first step in losing my life is raising my awareness to the emotions and needs of those around me…to seek ways that I can support and assist others into personal excellence rather than seeking out ways that others can help and support me. Once again, I cry out John the Baptist’s prayer: more of You God…less of me.

 

Edge God In Podcast Week 15: Leadership: Self-Awareness EQ

 

Self-Awareness => Self-Management

Social Awareness => Relationship Management

 

Focus for the study is on the 3rd essential component of emotional intelligence is social awareness. Our ability to effectively manage our relationships with those around us is in direct proportion to our ability to manage our own perceptions and emotions. As we expand our ability to manage our own emotions we are better equipped to tune into the emotions of people around us which is a key element in this 3rd step of EQ (Emotional Intelligence). How aware are you of the emotions of others? Do you listen to be understood or to understand? What does God say?

Learn:

Social Awareness: 2 Timothy 2:16: “Avoid profane idle talk for such people will become more and more godless. Their teaching will spread like gangrene.”

Be aware of the energy/behavior of others that surround you.

2 Timothy 3:2: “People will be self-centered and lovers of money, proud, haughty, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, irreligious, callous, implacable, slanderous, licentious, brutal, hating what is good. Traitors, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God. They make a pretense of religion yet deny it’s power.”

 

2 Timothy 4:3: “Be aware for a time is coming when people will not tolerate sound doctrine but following their own desires and insatiable curiosity, will accumulate teachers and will stop listening to the truth and will be diverted to myths (in amnesia of God’s presence)…But you be self-possessed (not possessed by the ways of the crowd; shiny objects; fame game) in ALL circumstances, put up with hardship; perform the work of an evangelist; fulfill your ministry.”

What is your ministry in this world? How does the distraction of the world bump you off course? What is your vice that negatively affects your social awareness? Is it cravings for position; possessions or popularity?

Reflect:

5 ways to Lead with Spiritual Intelligence with Emotional Awareness:

 

  1. Care about people – be aware just as God was.

Exodus 3:7:The LORD said, “I have surely seen the affliction of My people who       are in Egypt, and have given heed to their cry because of their taskmasters, for I am aware of their sufferings.

2. Embrace differences to make a big difference – don’t view differences as a melting pot but rather as a mosaic of opportunities

Romans 14:13. Let us not therefore judge one another anymore: but judge this rather, that no man put a stumbling block or an occasion to fall in his brother’s way.

3. Help individuals experience significance – Significance is the force that changes people lives and perspectives on what matters most

Matthew 5:14-16 “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.”

4. Be accountable: No one is perfect. Show vulnerability.

James 5:16 – Confess [your] faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.

  1. Be mindful of other people’s needs: A team is more powerful than the sum of its parts – but each part must be continually refurbished and renewed in order for the team to sustain its power. Read Colossians 3:12-14 (the Children’s version is simple and powerful): “God has chosen you and made you his holy people. He loves you. So always do these things: Show mercy to others, be kind, humble, gentle, and patient. Do not be angry with others, but forgive each other. If someone does wrong to you, then forgive him. Forgive each other because the Lord forgave you. Do all these things; but most important, love each other. Love is what holds you all together in perfect unity.”

Identify & Integrate:

Emotions will rule your life and you will rise and fall depending upon how the world judges you until you become bigger than the emotion at hand. What does this look like?

 

  • Identify and write down 3 emotions that trigger within you a similar emotion when expressed by another person. For example: when someone expresses frustration towards you, you immediately feel frustrated. Emotional Intelligence around the emotions of other people will move you to respond with questions: What specifically did I do or say that is frustrating you? How specifically could I have expressed what I said with more clarity?
  • Jesus was masterful at asking questions in the midst of emotional outbursts of people around Him. As you explore the emotional responses of other people that trigger a similar emotion within you, you are then in a position to identify it and adjust your behavior to honor the person you are committed to being in Christ. Science shows that when a human being maintains an inner connection to positive emotions (love, kindness, patience, compassion, curiosity) this positive emotion actually shifts the brain waves in the other person who is expressing a negative emotion (selfishness, judgement, envy).

Maintain:

  • As you explore the emotions of others, increase your awareness around what emotions evoke similar emotions within your body. Remember, an emotion is your body’s response to your thought life. For the next week, practice high noticing around other people’s emotions. Releasing all judgment, be the observer verses the reactor. Step off the stage of drama and reflect on how people interact with you and others.
  • At the end of the day journal your observations along with any emotions you experienced as a result of other people’s emotional reactions to life. What works for you and what does not work for you when it comes to your choice to be the observer vs the reactor?

Dear God, grant me the grace of generous assumptions. Help me to see other’s as you see me: as I desire to be rather than how I respond emotionally in ways that does not honor the person you know I want to be in you. Love evokes more love. I love because you first loved me. Help me to be love and kindness where there is no love and kindness, knowing that love and kindness win out in the end and every act on my part to participate in a random act of kindness will go viral in the heavenly realms. Have your way with me in spite of myself. More of you and less of me.

Surround yourself with people who make you a better person in life

Edge God In Podcast 14: Emotional Intelligence in God: Step 1

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EdgeGodIn.com | Host: Lauren E Miller

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Holy Spirit, grant me wisdom. Show me who you have created me to be in this world. Help me to see myself as God sees me rather than how I judge myself. I give you permission to remove everything within me that is not of God, that does not glorify Him or make Him recognizable in my life: my judgments…towards self and others…my conclusions about life that are based in story verses reality, including assuming and mind reading. I am nothing without you Lord, and with you I am everything and feel complete, significant and valued. Refresh me Lord so that I remain in you. Have your way with me in spite of myself.

Edge God In Podcast 14: Leadership: Self-Awareness EQ

Self-Awareness => Self-Management

Social Awareness => Relationship Management

Click Here to Download the PDF Edge God In Bible Study for this Podcast: EdgeGodIn Week 13- 1st Step in Emotional Intelligence

Edge God In Podcast 37: Food for the Flock

Feed the Flock

Father God, I ask that you bless this bible study by opening up our hearts and minds to the learning you have for us today.  I ask you that you enrich our abilities to learn, digest, apply all that we learn in a way that creates change in our hearts and minds.  With your guidance, I ask that your word provides the knowledge needed to shepherd your flock toward the revelation of knowledge that you have for them.  I thank you in advance for enriching our lives with this time to learn and experience more of you.

Edge God in Podcast Week 12: Food for the Flock

What does it mean to feed to flock?

Feeding the flock is a commitment to the worship of God. It is an active process which requires one to directly and personally experience him. It also takes us being actively involved in the works of the church (church meaning the body of Christ).

What does God say about feeding the flock?

1 Peter 5:2 says, “shepherd the flock of God among you, exercising oversight not under compulsion, but voluntarily, according to the will of God; and not for sordid gain, but with eagerness;

Jeremiah 3:15 says “Then I will give you shepherds after My own heart, who will feed you with knowledge and understanding.

Jeremiah 23:4 says, “I will also raise up shepherds over them and they will tend them, and they will not be afraid any longer, nor be terrified, nor will any be missing,” declares the LORD.

How to I shepherd the change in our hearts and minds?

  • In the world – We must be ready to receive the world no matter what state of readiness

Acts 17:10-11 says: received the work with all readiness, and searched the scriptures daily to find out whether these things were so.

We look too much into what we are told and don’t research or study what is there. In order to receive and flock the world, we need to be ready.

  • By faith – we have to return to the faith of the disciples. There were countless examples of their faith that stood the test of time. God says in Romans 14:23, that for whatever in not form faith is sin. He says in 2 Corinthians 5:7 twe walk by faith, not by sight.

Faith takes a relationship with God. It must be a relationship of trust at the root of the foundation. Trusting is hard if you can‘t see it and that is where the faith comes in.

  • Through the Gospels: they tell us that there is a sense of urgency in the feeding of the flock. God says we no not the time or hour when the son of man comes back but we do know what are work here is to do and that requires us to urgently and diligently work to do this.

Conclusion:  Feeding the flock can involve all forms of works in the church. Healing, ministering, teaching, etc.  Neglecting the “feeding the flock” is in turn very badly damaging to preaching the gospel to the world. You can’t be a casual observer but must be personally involved.

Edge God In Podcast 12: 5 Power Themes You Want to Know

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Sweet Jesus you call me to take every thought captive and make it obedient to you, perhaps this is the 1 practice that will allow me to release stress and anxiety within my life. Give me the grace today to pray about everything that spins or bumps me out of your peace that passes all human understanding. The world screams for my attention as hundreds of shiny objects cross my path in a day. May gentleness flow through my intonation to myself and those around me.

Edge God In Podcast 12: 5 Power Themes You Want to Know

Click Here to Download the PDF Edge God In Bible Study for this Podcast: EdgeGodIn Week 12 5 Themes You Want to Know

 

Self-Control: The Caboose of the Fruits

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Learn => Reflect => Identify & Adjust => Integrate => ACT

The fruits of the Spirit: Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness and gentleness are all ignited into action through the last fruit of the spirit: self-control. It is the Caboose of the fruits that keep the first 7 on track. Without self-control our ability to respond with love and forgiveness over hatred and judgment is blocked.

Scriptures: Learn:

“For God did not give us a spirit of fear but of POWER, Love & Self-Control.” 1 Timothy 1:7

“Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Romans 12:1

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

‘Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,’ says the LORD Almighty.” Zechariah 4:6

Reflect/Identify & Adjust:

One of my favorite reminders of who I am in this world comes from the above verse in 1 Timothy 1:7.  Let’s dismantle this a little to give it more clarity of focus thus increasing our ability to put it into daily action.

First of all, know what you are and what you are not. This releases inner anxiety instantly:

You are a child of God, possessing the blue print of the creator of the universe flowing through your spirit that is beyond all momentary troubles and tribulations.  Your spirit knows itself to be enough, capable and victorious at all times even in the eye of the storm. Simply put, you are first and foremast a spiritual being having a physical experience, as proclaimed by the Christian mystics throughout history. 

You are not your circumstance; judgments from yourself and others; traumatic situations; rejection; fear; doubt or worry…unless you choose to believe you are in which case the spirit of fear will twist the reality of who you are as created in the image AND likeness of God.

For God did not give us a spirit of fear but of POWER, Love & Self-Control. You have a spirit that moves with self-control: the ability to choose a certain response to life that serves your well-being and the well being of all concerned.  We do not use the spirit of self-control enough in our daily life as we play victim to our circumstances: “If I don’t get this certain outcome I won’t be able to handle it”…”life is a struggle”…”I can’t do that”, “Nothing ever works out for me” “I don’t understand why they did that, said that, didn’t do that…why things work out for other people and not for me.”

In order to experience the POWER and the LOVE contained at the heart of our spirit which fuels our ability to create, self-control needs to be resurrected to the front lines of our responses to people, things and circumstances.

Integrate/ACT:

This week practice self-control…step back from your quick responses to life, often fueled by emotional flare-ups of unbridled ambition and seek the wisdom that flows from the Holy Spirit, known as the Counselor: “Give me the words to speak that are in my best interest and reflect the higher good I am created for, or the silence needed for even greater wisdom and guidance.” Remember, true greatness comes through the archway of temperance, humility and love. The gap, which allows wisdom to drop in between what happens around you and your response to it, grows bigger with each act of self-control.

Dear God, I give you permission to resurrect within me the spirit that is my birth right as your child on earth: A spirit of POWER, LOVE and SELF-CONTROL.  In order for me to experience the power of your love through my thoughts, words and responses to the life in front of my face I need the grace of faith in action manifested through self-control.  Help me to remember who I am this week, why I do what I do and the bigger picture in life. Expand my ability to control my thoughts of self defeat, judgment of self and others that render me incapable of accessing the strength and power of my spirit to overcome and powerfully witness to the successful creative nature that manifests a greater good on earth, which I am willing to consider I will focus on at the sunset of this life.  Help me to live my life backwards…doing, saying, creating those things that at my last breath, as I reflect on how I showed up each day, will cause me to hear the sweet words of ultimate success in life: “well done, my good and faithful servant, you remembered who you are, what you are capable of & why, with the gift of each new dawn your heart continued to beat.”

Questions for Growth:

What specific area of your life would you like to practice more self-control this week in order to bring Glory to God?

What could you do today that would help you think about what is good and admirable?

When is it easy to let the Holy Spirit guide your actions? When is it difficult?

Our Next Virtual Bible Study will be October 28th at 9:30 am EST/7:30 am MT/6:30 am PST 

Because of His Love,

Lauren <><

How to Release Irritation

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Irritation in this life will often flow from your need to be right, seen, acknowledged, recognized, respected and responded to in a specific way…can you imagine giving these antics up and knowing you have already made it in this life? God delights in you, no need for outside reinforcements. I would imagine we would have a lot of mind space freed up to create more love and beauty in this world…is not that the purpose for which we are graced with another heart beat?

Dear God, may I remember as I open my eyes to another gift of life today that you delight in me and see me for all that I desire to be in this world.  

Thank you for giving me the grace today to release my need for certain outcomes in order to feel secure, joyful and successful.  

Thank you that I have the ability to scale the perceived walls in my life along with the capability to create more beauty and love.

May I remember throughout the day that it is not so much WHAT I am doing but the LOVE that I put behind what I do that makes all of the difference in the outcomes I experience on earth.  Have your way with me in spite of myself.

You, O Lord, keep my lamp burning; my God turns my darkness into light.  With your help I can advance against a troop, with my God I Can Scale a Wall.” Psalm 18: 28-29

Because of His Love,

Lauren <><