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How are we as Christians view Instruction?

When giving instructions, you often see the imperative form in instruction manuals or when someone tells you how to do something.

Often there is  “sequencing” words to show the steps in the process. Like, “firstly”, “secondly” and “finally”.

Many times we are not sure if we are given appropriate instruction or it is not clearly articulated.  This leads to doubt, frustration, anger or the lack of a successful outcome.

So what should be our source of how we give accept and experience the best godly outcome for the instruction we experience?  This can be viewed in 3 simple ways.

1. Listening
2. Accepting
3. Gaining

Let’s dive deeper into these areas :

The first area in instruction is Listening:

Listening is something we are not taught to do, but it is so important in expanding knowledge capacity and having successful conversations.

Proverbs 19:20

“Listen to advice and accept instruction, that you may gain wisdom in the future.”

This wisdom helps us strengthen and uncover areas of misunderstanding allowing us to improve relationships now and in the future.

Ask yourself:

• Do you listen more than you talk?
• Are you allowing yourself to take time to understand instruction in preparation for the future?

The second area of instruction is Accepting:

There is much instruction in our world but how do we know it is Godly instruction?

 1 John 4:1

“Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.”

Jeremiah 33:3 

“Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.”

God give dignifies us with free, the power to make decisions of our own. This free will must be managed by instruction given to us by God.

Ephesians 6:14

“Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness.”

This means we are protected by truth and righteousness.  And it also means that we have to use Jesus teaching as our guide and reference to acceptance of good instruction.

Ask yourself:

• Are you evaluating the source to make sure it aligns with my Godly principles?
• Are you asking God to be your guide in the instruction you are receiving?
• How can I do this more often in my daily life?

 The last area of instruction is Gaining

A Harvard business review article once wrote that seeking advice is central to effective leadership and decision making. And that receiving advice is often seen as the passive consumption of wisdom. When the exchange is done on both sides both benefit.

2 Timothy 3:16-17 

“All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work.”

Proverbs 4:13

“Keep hold of instruction, do not let go, guard her, for she is your life.”

Ask yourself:

• Are you taking and seeking the advice of other to gain better wisdom?
• Do you hold on and value the instruction you are getting?
• How are you going to apply the three areas of listening, accepting, and gaining in your life moving forward?

Estella & Lauren

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Edge God In Podcast 8: How to Be Free From Frustration in Life

Frustration is an emotion that occurs when you want something to happen and it doesn’t. It can be as simple as driving to work. You want to drive to work without any interruptions and all of the sudden you hit traffic: SHAZAM FRUSTRATION slithers onto the scene and steals your peace. In daily life frustration will usually occur in the presence of the following needs:

• The need to be right
• The need to be liked
• The need to understood
• The need to get something you want: a promotion; a sale; a relationship; a break from hardship

All of the above fuels for frustration have one thing in common: NEED. I NEED this to happen in order to feel safe, connected, enough, valued, successful, at peace, confident…what is your muse?

What does God say about all of this NEED in life?  What solutions and wisdom does He give us to bring us out of NEED into trust, faith and profound confidence and peace?

1. The need to be right: Do you need the last word? The EGO screams for the last word and will twist our inner world hunting and gathering information to prove our case in relationships. What is that about? Where does this deep desire to be right come from? Explore the following statements the next time you feel frustration over wanting to be right:

• If I’m not right then ______________________
• I need you to know that I am right because _______________________________
• Being right is important to me because____________________________________

Solution: Proverbs 21:2: “People may think their own ways are right, but the LORD weighs the heart.” Lean into God’s wisdom in situations and practice humility along with speaking the truth in love. Resist the urge to convince from a place of self-satisfaction and leave room for the Lord to weigh the heart. Ask in the face of feeling the other person is wrong and you are right and you need to convince them of your position: “Lord grant me the grace of humility and release to feel your peace in the midst of differing opinions having full confidence that your truth will prevail, that is enough for me.”

2. The Need to be Liked: Galatians 1:10: “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” I remember one time being spun by the thought that a certain person didn’t like me. In the midst of my imploding moment I heard the Lords gentle voice: “Excuse me? Excuse me? (in a very tender and firm intonation) just so you know, you are not here to be liked you are here to be loved and to love.”

Questions for reflection:

• When have you NEEDED the approval of someone else in order to feel good about yourself?
• Do you ever check how many likes you have on social media?
• How much time do you spend checking your connection with human beings during the day (texting, calls, emails?)
• How much time do you spend during your day checking on your connection with God (pausing and praying in God’s guidance and wisdom before moving forward into your next “to-do” item on your list?)

3. The Need to be Understood: Romans 15:3: “For even Christ did not please himself but, as it is written: ‘The insults of those who insult you have fallen on me.” The next time you feel misunderstood and frustration is occupying your interior world pause and imagine sitting with Jesus and handing over that need to be understood. Ask him to replace that need with his peace and confidence. Too often our need to be understood is fueled by EGO, the place where we edge God out and take the throne. The truth of many situations in life is that we don’t understand so why get frustrated when someone else can’t understand our perspectives? “Whoever is patient has great understanding, but one who is quick-tempered displays folly.” Proverbs 14:29 

Questions for reflection:

• How do you respond when someone does not understand you?
• When you listen and speak is it with the intention to be understood or the curiosity to understand?

4. The Need to Get Something I Want: “You crave what you do not have. You kill and covet, but are unable to obtain it. You quarrel and fight. You do not have, because you do not ask. And when you do ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may squander it on your pleasures.” James 4:2-3

Self-Reflection:

• The next time you are frustrated identify what you want in the situation, why you want it and then reflect on how this want glorifies God and supports the person you are committed to being in Christ.

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Episode 5: Faith and Conflict Management

 Conflict can be good when it brings out feelings and concerns in individuals, groups, and teams leading to a cooperative spirit, but it can be very bad when (a) the source and type of conflict can’t be determined (b) there is no solutions in place to handle it and (c) not knowing where we fit in regards to conflict management quadrants.

Christians should have an understanding in three areas so they can approach conflict with skills talk in scripture.

1. Understanding the types and sources of conflict

Conflict is stirred up by a hot-tempered heart

“A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel” (Proverbs 15:18).

Conflict is stirred up by a perverse heart

“A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends” (Proverbs 16:28).
Conflict is stirred up by a greedy heart

“The greedy stir up conflict, but those who trust in the Lord will prosper (Proverbs 28:25).

Conflict is stirred up by an angry heart

“An angry person stirs up conflict, and a hot-tempered person commits many sins” (Proverbs 29:2).

2. Understand solutions to conflict

Conflict can be solved if others get involved

“But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses’” (Matthew 18:16).

Conflict needs to be resolved before leaving a gift to God

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift” (Matthew 5:23-24)

Conflict needs to be dealt with right away

“Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still together on the way, or your adversary may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. Truly I tell you, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny” (Matthew 5:25-26).

3. Understand where you are in regards to handling conflict and why.

We must understand why we have conflict and how we process it individually.

There is a popular assessment for conflict management, the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument or TKI analysis, shares five areas that individuals gravitate to when involved with conflict.  These areas are Competing, Collaborating, Compromising, Avoiding, and Accommodating.  In order for us to handle conflict we must understand if we are underusing or over using these five areas.  We must do an assessment of our self to see where we sit in these areas and set goals that build a cooperative spirit and balance in them all.

Once we understand how we can stay in balance we also must understand why conflict happens so much especially to use as Christians.

Ephesians 6:12, tells us our battle on earth as Christians “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms”.

So in conclusion: Conflict will always be with us as Christians, but by assessing ourselves and knowing the source and solution we can overcome it successfully.

Lauren&Estella

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Dear Lord, I find myself running to the cave clinging to the thing that I feel I need in order to know that I am Ok, enough and valued. Help me to remember that nothing the world has to offer can compare to the surpassing knowledge of knowing you as my Lord and Savior. Help me not to follow shiny objects that upon my grip lose their shine. Tolkien so wisely chose the name Gollum, the “unman” to represent the man or woman who has lost themselves in the fetish. Protect me from losing myself in trinkets and positions in life that have no power to save or satisfy. You are my Lord and Savior, I lack nothing with you.

Edge God In Podcast  7 : What’s Your “Precious?”

Click Here to Download the PDF Edge God In Bible Study for this Podcast: Edge God In Podcast 7 What Is Your Precious?